Blog, Lifestyle, Squad Goals

My Queendom Is Dope

Long story short, your squad says a lot about you. Your squad should also be the roots that ground you.


We all know the saying, “It takes a village…” It really does take a village, in all that we do, even carrying over into adulthood. I have come across some amazing people over the years, but I realized the true importance of being your “sister’s keeper” while keeping this mantra in the forefront of my thoughts. This hit me like a ton of bricks because women, for me, I couldn’t put my trust in because of hurt that was put upon me at a young age. I struggled with the concept of having a “girlfriend” that I could confess my soul to and not be afraid to be vulnerable with. It’s funny how we could bare our souls to a man, but we have such walls up with our own sisters. That was me. Showing any type of emotion was foreign to me, because I didn’t do it: hugging, embracing, saying “I love you”, or just showing your appreciation for someone. I had such a wall up, and it carried over into other relationships subconsciously.


Anyways, I did what any normal person would do when they realize they are lacking something and they so desperately want it. They search. I searched and found some interesting people along the way. Some that didn’t appreciate what I had to offer so I faked my way to maintain relationships. Some that just had no value to add to my life and left my cup empty and instead of trying to fill it up. Some that I just simply could have gone without. I had to take a step back for a second and realize the positions I was putting myself in. I was creating confusion for myself instead of genuine energy.


I started to consciously focus on becoming a better me so that I could become a better friend, a better daughter, a better sister, a better me. It was only then that I finally allowed what was in the universe to naturally come to me and embrace it. It brought me a true circle of people who loved me and embraced me. They pushed me and challenged me in my thoughts, they showed me that vulnerability is a strength, not a weakness. They showed me what a queendom really was. They brought me another sense of freedom because I didn’t feel as if I was putting on a show in order to maintain. Now, needless to say not all friendships will last. And it’s OK, because they are not meant to. You just make sure you stay steadfast to who you are and continue to do what you must do to stay high.


I really didn’t want to get to deep in this post, but I did want to make this post to not only show my appreciation for the ones around me, but to also let you know that what is real does not need to be questioned nor does it need to make you feel any differently about yourself. Apart of freeing yourself from within is making sure you surround yourself with people that allow you to do that. Not that you need anyone’s permission, but be conscious about who is in your corner building you up rather than tearing you down or keeping you stagnant.


My Queendom is dope because we all joing our strengths collectively to empower one another and build because we are only as strong as our sister.


My Queendom is dope because we are not PETTY. At the end of the day we are all human and we may have disagreements here and there but we actually work the shit out like adults and we don’t go below the belt.


My Queendom is dope when we have those moments where we might forget who we are, we have one another to remind each other of our purpose and our power so that we can keep going on.


So, those four, five, or maybe even six people that popped up in your mind as you read this, you need to keep them around. As Madea said, “You will come across people in your life who are meant to be roots. They will help you grown and ain’t going nowhere.”







My thoughts and words give me a sense of strength like none other because they give me freedom, freedom to be comfortable with myself, internally and externally. Something I denied myself up until this point, because I was scared. Scared of criticism, scared of judgment, scared of truly just being myself. I had to come to a point where I had to understand I’m not living for anyone else, I’m living for Sitoria.